I went to the pictures tomorrow

And took a front seat at the back

I fell from the pit to the gallery

And broke a front bone in my back

The lady she gave me some chocolate

I ate it and gave it her back

I phoned for a taxi and walked it

And that’s why I never came back

This was my favourite poem as a child, although technically a playground rhyme it was silly, confusing and mentioned chocolate, I loved it.

Over the years my taste in poetry has not changed a bit, so when I heard about Scottee’s ‘poetry piss up’ I became very giddy, there was jumping and giggles.

A performance artist and presenter, Scottee’s flamboyant persona has graced the audiences of the Royal Opera House, Radio 4, Dazed & Confused and Time Out London, to name but a few.Hosting regular poetry evenings called ‘Fraff’ he states that you “Don’t come if you consider yourself a fan of Pam Ayres”, you have been warned.

Showing in Rich Mix East London, you can expect readings from drag artist Jonny Woo and Michael Twaits, the ‘bestest shitty poem’ award, cheap beer & sweets and permission to heckle performers reading poetry about love, this is genuinely my idea of the perfect date!



The Time: 7.30pm Friday 12th September (check  Scottee’s website for future dates)

The Place: Rich Mix 35-47 Bethnal Green Road, Bethnal Green, London E1 6LA

Tickets: £8, unreserved seating, via Rich Mix’s booking page.

For more details: or


  • Images used from &
  • Info used from &
  • Poem by Mike Rosen and Susanna Steele ‘Inky Pinky Ponky collected playground rhymes’, published by Granada Publishing Limited 1982


Drunk poetry madness!

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