Category Archives: Funny

Don’t swing your axe around like that

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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Had a hard day at work?

Need to let off some steam?

Want to throw an axe at something but don’t want to go down for distruction of public property or murder?

Well then me thinks you need to spend a few hours at Whistle Punks, an axe throwing party for all.

After some safety training from Whistle’s in-house throwing coaches you’ll be able to let rip on the wooden targets along with your friends, just remember to keep the competitiveness friendly, axes are no joke people.

 

The Place:  Arch 25 Handel Business Centre, 73 Bondway, Vauxhall SW8 1SQ

The Time:  Confirmed when booking tickets, Sundays are considered Off Peak times.

Tickets:  Ticket prices start from £22 during Off Peak times and £29 during Peak Bookings can be made here

Contact:  whistlepunks.com

 

 

 

 

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Halloween 2018

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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It’s October 26th and you still haven’t made plans for Halloween, lets see if we can help.

 

DJ Yoda’s Stranger Things Halloween Party

Got a thing for the 80’s then get those white stilettos, stone washed jeans and back combed hair over to EartH in Dalston for DJ Yoda’s cult 80’s movie fancy dress party, 80’s costumes are MANDATORY. 

  • EartH 11-17 Stoke Newington Road, N16 8BH
  • 2nd Nov from 9pm, Over 18s Only Tickets available here

 

 

BFI Halloween Movie Screenings

Not into costumes, what a movie, BFI will be screening 2 Halloween favourites Shaun of the Dead followed by The Evil Dead on the 31st Oct, don’t forget your popcorn.

  • BFI Southbank, Belvedere Road, South Bank, London SE1 8XT
  • 31st Oct from 6pm, Over 18s Only Tickets available here

 

 

Spooky Stories at Shakespeare’s Globe

Something spooky for the kids that doesn’t involve sweets, Terrifying Tales for Enchanted Nights hosted by Vanessa Woolf is a series of spooky stories and tales from around the world told in one of the worlds most famous buildings 

  • 21 New Globe Walk, Bankside, London SE1 9DT
  • 27th Oct at 11am, suitable for 8 yrs old and older, children under 16 yrs old need to be accompanied by an adult Tickets available here

 

 

London Horror Festival

“The UK’s original and largest festival of live horror performances will return to the Old Red Lion Theatre from 7th October – 3rd November 2018.”

If you like your horror in living colour then a month of live performances, courtesy of the London Horror Festival will be right up your alley.

  • Old Red Lion Theatre 418 St John Street London EC1V 4NJ
  • 7th Oct – 3rd Nov, for tickets and performance listings click here

 

 

One for the Poddles

Even dogs like to dress up every once in a while and what better time then Halloween. Dogs and their owners are invited to the Halloween Dog Walk and Show on the 28th Oct, costumes are welcomed but not mandatory.

Registration begins at 11am and the walk starts at 12, the show commences at 1pm from The Spaniards Inn on the heath. Bring your wellies. 

  • The Spaniards Inn, Spaniards Road, Hampstead, NW3 7JJ
  • 28th Oct, to get involved with the fun click here

 

Pancake Day Races

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It’s the season of love…love for PANCAKES, bring on the batter.

 

London Pancake Races

What better way to work up an appetite then racing in a costume with a pan in your hand, brilliant fun. There’re a number of races happening across the capital today, get down to your closest, whip your phone out and get to filming.

 

<iframe src=”https://www.google.com/maps/d/embed?mid=17hSJyqcBDuumDZzoNwKEtzyNAZSMZ-Xk&hl=en” width=”640″ height=”480″> 

 

 

LONDON INTER LIVERY PANCAKE RACE

Watch the 4 tradesman teams of the City of London race for the pride of the City, the proceeds go towards a number of different charities. 

Guildhall Yard, London EC2V

calendarcustoms.com/articles/london-inter-livery-pancake-race/

 

GREAT SPITALFIELDS PANCAKE RACE

Teams of 4 will race to the bitter end to raise funds for the London Air Ambulance. Races start at 12.30, free admission.

Old Truman Brewery, 91 Brick Lane, Spitalfields E1 6QL

alternativearts.co.uk

 

BETTER BANKSIDE PANCAKE RACE

Upto 25 teams of 4 will be racing for the championship of the pan (I made that up) who will win brag rights over all all others, get yourself over to Borought Market at 12.30pm to find out. All proceeds go to Paintings in Hospitals

Jubilee Place Borough Market, SE1 9AA

betterbankside.co.uk/events/13-february-better-bankside-pancake-day-race

 

FLIPPIN’ GOOD FUN FOR A GOOD CAUSE – THE GREENWICH MARKET PANCAKE RACE

Teams, pairs of friends or solo mission persons are all welcome to take part in this race, medals up for the winning, free pancake for all participants. Race starts at 12pm all donations go to The Greenwich and Bexley Hospice. 

Greenwich Market London SE10 9HZ

greenwichmarket.london/events/detail/flippin-good-fun-for-a-good-cause-the-greenwich-market-pancake-race

 

2018 REHAB PARLIAMENTARY PANCAKE RACE

Even PMs, Lords & the Media get in on the racing action.  Watches these Westminster lot don their costumes and battle it out, pan in hand for the right to rub it in the faces of the LOSERS for the next 365 days. Funds go to Monument Skills, a charity that helps those with brain injuries and neurological conditions. Race starts at 10am

Victoria Gardens, Millbank, Westminster, London SW1P 3JA 

rehab.ie/fundraising/pancake-race

 

 

All info used from: rehab.ie, greenwichmarket.london, betterbankside.co.uk, alternativearts.co.uk, calendarcustoms.com

Image used from: metrouk2.files.wordpress.com

 

The Great Willy Waddle

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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Cancer in any form is no joke and though the majority of us do our best to stay informed and give to Cancer Research Charities Penile Cancer still seems to sit in the background.

So how can we bring this issue back into the public eye? …With a Penis Fun Run, of course.

On the 26th September Orchid will be hosting a 2k charity run in Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park in Stratford.

To participate you must register in advance HERE, minimum pledge amount is £100. All donations will go towards Orchid’s work in penile cancer research, education and support services.

 

On the day you’ll receive your inflatable penis costume upon entry (alternative costume colours available please email to enquire), you’ll then run, walk or waddle your way to the finish line all in the name of charity.

Never before has it been more acceptable to be a penis :0)

 

 

The Time:  Tuesday 26th Sept at 6.30pm

The Place:  Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park, Stratford, London 

Price:  Registration Fee is £20, minimum pledge amount £100

Contact:  events@orchid-cancer.org.uk or orchid-cancer.org.uk

 

 

 

The Chuckle Brothers at the Hippodrome

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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I’m not going to beat around the bush with this one, The Chuckle Brothers are going to be at the Kingston Hippodrome for Freshers Week. It’s been awhile since Freshers Week applied to me, but I might buy a ticket just so I can meet the Chuckle brothers…it’s the Chuckle Brothers!!!!!!

 

 

“To me, To you”, who knew The Chuckles Brothers recording a track with Tinchy Stryder, I can’t handle this.

If you’re a real Fresher and in the Kingston Upon Thames area on the 22nd September then head over to the Hippodrome for an evening with THE CHUCKLE BROTHERS!

I can’t say it enough. I’m so pleased they’re still working the circuit, good on you fellas :0)

 

 

The Time:  Friday 22nd September from 10pm

The Place:  The Hippodrome, Kingston Upon Thames, 1 St. James’ Road, Kingston Upon Thames, KT1 2AH Surrey

Price:  Early bird tickets start from £2.00, late entry tickets and tickets on the door cost more, from here.

Contact:  kingstonhippodrome.co.uk email kingston@kingstonhippodrome.co.uk  

 

 

 

 

 

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Disney Karaoke

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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“Have some of column A
Try all of column B
I’m in the mood to help you dude

… ….. ….. … . …… …. ..”

 

If you know what the missing lyrics are then head over to The Hackney Picture House on Friday 22nd September for an evening of Disney Karaoke magic.

If you can sing (or even if you can’t) then show Hackney Central what you’re made of, and if you buy the tickets in advance you save £2…that’s 2 quid that can go towards another beer!

 

Enjoy :0)

 

 

The Time:  Doors open at 8pm, the madness starts at 8.30pm

The Place:  Hackney Picturehouse, 270 Mare Street, London E8 1HE

Price:  Tickets £6 in advance, £8 on the door

Contact:  picturehouses.com

 

 

 

 

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The Potato Project

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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I used to eat jacket potatoes with a drizzle of olive oil, not baked beans or ever butter, olive oil, very odd and not very imaginative, thankfully the guys at The Potato Project are here to help, especially if you’re failing at food like I am. 

Available on the menu combinations such as Autumn wild mushrooms + spinach + blue cheese & truffle oil, Thai chicken + coconut & lime curry and The naked potato with butter (just encase you’re a fan of the classics) all available on both sweet and your classic jacket potato.

 

Also available is a side of Sweet potato hummus with pear, Gin & Tonic ice Cream and coffee which, I think, is flirting with me??? 

 

 

 

The Time:  Mon – Fri 10am – 6pm

The Place:  

27 Noel Street, Soho, London W1F 8GZ

99 George Street, Unit 30 Boxpark Croydon, CR0 1LD

Price:  Start from £4.20 for a main and £2.60 for a side

Contact:  thepotatoproject.com

 

 

 

 

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Twin Me

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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Have you ever wanted a mini you to greet you after a long day at work, or an army of GI Joe sized figurines with your face at every doorway and window of your home to deter would-be burglars?

Of course you do, so where do you go, to Twin Me that’s where.  

 

Trump riding on all the riches! Credit: Alexander de Cadenet – cadenet@aol.com

 

Offering 3D printed replicas in varying sizes and poses, Twin Me can give you the perfect gift, yourself.

 

 

Also available are freakishly realistic silicone masks, brilliant for Halloween, or again for deterring would-be burglars, imagine somebody breaking in then immediately be confronted by a 6 foot tall figure of a little girl looking straight at you with a sadistic smile on her face, no thank you very much!

 

 

 

The Time:  Mon – Tue: 12pm – 8pm, Wed – Sat 10.30am – 9pm, Sun 12pm – 6pm

The Place:  127A Queensway, London, W2 4SJ

Price:  Vary

Contact:  twinme.co.uk email info@twinme.co.uk

 

 

 

 

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London Improv Theatre

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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I cannot act, there isn’t an inch of me that should be on stage or in front of a camera (unlike a friend of mine who is A brilliant actor, I hate her!), the thought of improv literally scares me into a sweaty panic attack, but there’re those crazy bastards who thrive on that type of adrenaline, step forward the London Improv Theatre.

 

 

Established in 2016 by Jake Lyons, the theatre plays host to Improv performances such comedy, sketches, music and even magic, oh how I love me a bit of magic.

A number of performances are on over September including an acoustic showcase (showcase performances are on the first Saturday of each month) , ‘Scared Scriptless’ where the participates improvise scenes based on audience suggestions and ‘The Magicians Showcase’ which I may well attend myself (love me a bit of magic).

If you’re after an evening of impromptu theatre, or in the mood to joy in yourself, pop on over to Swiss Cottage, it won’t disappoint.

 

 

The Time:  Varies

The Place:   London Improv Theatre, 104-A Finchley Road, Londnon, NW3 5JJ

Tickets:  Prices vary but generally start from £5/6 in advance.

Contact:  londonimprovtheatre.com

 

 

 

 

 

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BallieBallerson Adult Ball Pit

Posted on by Rai The shiny nut
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Ball pits are no longer for kids alone, now adults can relive their youth by throwing themselves into pools of plastic bubbles without being escorted from the premises. Welcome to BallieBallerson.

Located in Stoke Newington, over 2 floors, you have a choice of 2 ballrooms, Retro & Glowing. Retro being of the multicoloured ball variety, and glowing consisting of clear coloured balls sitting on a floor decorated with hundreds of LED lights. 

 

Both floors are equipped with a bar serving planet inspired cocktails, though I hear Uranus is undrinkable without popping a miracle pill first!

Ballie is most popular in the evening however day time slots are also available, at which bottomless Prosecco, Punch…and Spaghetti Meat Balls are on offer (spaghetti meat balls).

Oh they have a live DJ too, so if you’re having a bad week grab some friends, get over to Stokey and throw balls at each other while drinking Uranus 🙃

 

  • The Time:  Bottomless Bunch Saturdays 12 – 3pm, Sundays 1 – 4pm.  Evenings Wed – Thurs 6pm – 12am, Fri – Sat 6pm – 2am
  • The Place:  79 Stoke Newington Road, Dalston, N16 8AD
  • Price:  Ticket prices start from £10.90, click here for more details
  • Contact:  For more info click here
  • Additional Note:  Veggie meat also available